Here / Now With Mela Murder
Here / Now With Mela Murder
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Mela Murder lets that fierce lioness within her roar and be heard.
At 8 months pregnant, Mela stopped us in our tracks with her hypnotic vogueing and empowering lyrics for a dance film with Chromat titled Mother. She choreographed, performed, wrote and directed the entire thing. She then took our hearts in the award-winning film, “The Florida Project,” where she portrayed a single mother who worked tirelessly to make ends meet and set a positive example for her son. Every time Mela popped up on our radar, she was sharing a piece of her, in a raw and real way that is truly Mela. She doesn’t hold back and that authenticity is slaying conventions and drawing everyone in to listen to what she has to share. She says her daughter Amethyst drastically changed her life, but in a way, she was ready to be a nurturing and leading figure all along. In addition to continuing her career in music as a choreographer, she is the curator of the #letstalk initiative, a community that seeks to provide mental and emotional support for single mothers. And her candid and honest accounts of her experiences with Amethyst have been breaths of fresh air and relief in an increasingly posed and staged world that strives for perfection and instagram-worthy snapshots of “life.” It is amazing to see Mela have the courage to openly share her life  to bring attention to and build support for single motherhood in such an impactful way. She is a testament to the power of a woman and the built-in support we can nurture for one another.
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  • I am happiest when:
  • I am happiest when surrounded with people who are sincerely understanding and loving of me. When I don’t have to question a persons intention where I can feel comfortable being my truest self. That is my happy place. To be able to express myself openly whether it be with my words or through any form of art I desire, to not feel judged or scrutinized under negative lens truly puts me in a state of bliss.

  • How motherhood has helped me grow:
  • I believe every human on Earth has their own individual timing of when they experience a moment of awakening. That moment for me was motherhood. It was as if the stars aligned and my true path’s purpose appeared right before my eyes. I had the answers I had been searching years for. I understood what the actual meaning of my life was — it is love. But this type of love, A mothers love, is a feeling only a mother can understand. It is the deepest and purest love. This love is the energy that fuels me when I am so exhausted and want to stay in bed for the rest of my life, This love drives me to carry on, to show up and do my best. All for my daughter. Because I love her so much, I have learned to love myself more.

  • It's not always easy and is a lot of hard work, but my biggest support is:
  • My mother. I actually can’t stand how emotionally dependent I am and have always been to my mother. I just respect her so much and admire her strength and how effortless she makes everything seem. It actually blows my mind. Now that I am a mother and feel the struggles of single motherhood with my one child, I think, Sheesh how did she cope with 3?! AND she was so young. My mother is a warrior that has overcame plenty of trauma. She never let her low experiences defeat her, She let it be the fuel for her growth. She was determined to make my sisters’ and my life better than her life. She is a phenomenal woman. She’s a true inspiration. She’s my best (and only) friend. She’s beautiful. She’s amazing. Im totally obsessed. I love you, ma! Thank you for all that you’ve done and continue to do.

  • Three things I want to share with mothers from my experience:
  • This journey is a beautiful and chaotic one to say the least and we all need to gather up and support each other through it. #1 Do not be hard on yourselves, #2 Be gentle with yourselves, #3 Be patient. Understand that there is no such thing as perfection when it comes to motherhood. We must figure it out our own way on our own time the way it works best for us. What may work for me, may not work for you and that is perfectly fine. There is no book or manual that you can follow that’ll make this experience any easier. What’ll make this more mentally manageable is support from like-minded women who to a degree understand what you may be going through, whether it be emotionally, psychologically or just in your day to day life. You have support don’t be afraid to reach out for it.

Mela Murder photographed by Carmen Chan in Los Angeles HERE / NOW WITH MORE AMAZING WOMEN